


Season 2, Episode 7: The Alps

by Lunarium



Category: Agent Carter (TV)
Genre: Captain America Adventure Program, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-17
Updated: 2015-07-17
Packaged: 2018-04-09 18:25:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 853
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4359578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lunarium/pseuds/Lunarium
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Among the archives of the Captain America Adventure Program lies one peculiar transcript.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Season 2, Episode 7: The Alps

**Author's Note:**

  * For [saiditallbefore](https://archiveofourown.org/users/saiditallbefore/gifts).



> I tried to capture the cheesiness (and sexism) of the radio show, but hopefully this isn't too cheesy. First line is from the 1960’s Captain America cartoon, but let’s pretend the tune began in the 40’s. :)

**MUSIC:**

| 

(Brief jingle: “When Captain America throws his mighty shield…”)   
  
---|---  
  
**NARRATOR:**

| 

And now it's time for the Captain America Adventure Program, brought to you by Roxxon motor oil! Tonight's thrilling tale takes us deep into hidden caves of the Alps as Captain America and the 107th Infantry search for Betty Carver, the battalion's beautiful triage nurse who was taken hostage by Hitler’s evil Nazi guards! Imprisoned inside a large cage, she floats above a great pot of smoldering acid with only a chain keeping her from plunging to her death!   
  
**FX:**

| 

(Chains rattling, thick bubbling sound)   
  
**BETTY:**

| 

Oh, Captain America, save me!   
  
**NARRATOR:**

| 

Will Captain America and his men get to her on time?!   
  
**MUSIC:**

| 

(Music)   
  
**BETTY:**

| 

(In tears) If I die, I will never get a chance to tell Captain America how much I love him!   
  
**HITLER:**

| 

(German accent) Yes, yes! Keep crying! Captain America will hear your voice and come right where I want him!   
  
**BETTY:**

| 

Wait till Captain America gets his hands on you!   
  
**HITLER:**

| 

You have so much faith in a dead man, hahahaha! But no worries, pretty! You can join him in death if you’d like!   
  
**CAP AMERICA:**

| 

I have come, Betty! Do not fear!   
  
**HITLER:**

| 

Speak of the devil! Ah, Captain America, you will never be able to save Betty in time! All I have to do is pull this lever, and Betty falls straight to her death!   
  
**FX:**

| 

(Chain pulley: short pull chain foley, Betty screams as the cage drops lower.)   
  
**CAP AMERICA:**

| 

I am warning you, Hitler! If I see one scratch on Betty, by the time I’m done with you will be sorry you were ever born!   
  
**HITLER:**

| 

You talk big for someone once so small!   
  
**CAP AMERICA:**

| 

I can have you and your entire crew down in one minute!   
  
**NAZI SOLDIER:**

| 

(German accent) You and what army?   
  
**ROARING COMMANDOS:**

| 

(Multiple voices) This army! We are the Roaring Commandos! Captain America is our leader and you will not stand in the way of justice and freedom!   
  
**FX:**

| 

(Sounds of fists pounding, grunts, someone being thrown against a desk)   
  
**ROARING COMMANDOS:**

| 

Captain! The stairs! Hitler’s trying to get away!   
  
**CAP AMERICA:**

| 

Thank you, Abe Jones! I will keep my eyes on him!   
  
**HITLER:**

| 

Even while your girl is in danger, Captain?   
  
**FX:**

| 

(Chain pulley, quickened pace)   
  
**BETTY:**

| 

Eek, Captain! I’m falling!   
  
**NARRATOR:**

| 

And at the sound of his beloved Betty’s cries, Captain America turned his eyes away from Hitler and watched as she fell closer to her death.   
  
**CAP AMERICA:**

| 

Betty, no!   
  
**ROARING COMMANDOS:**

| 

We’ve got everyone, but where is Hitler?   
  
**CAP AMERICA:**

| 

We will deal with him later! Have no fear, dear Betty! I will send my trusty young companion here to carry you to safety - Bucky, get on it!   
  
**BUCKY:**

| 

(Young voice) Sure, Cap!   
  
**MUSIC:**

| 

(Brief instrumental jingle)   
  
**NARRATOR:**

| 

And Betty Carver was saved by the team effort of Captain America and his friends! But when Bucky returned with Betty, it was to find Captain America gone! But no sooner had he done asking the Roaring Commandos where America’s greatest hero was, Captain America himself reappeared with an unconscious Hitler slung over his shoulders!   
  
**CAP AMERICA:**

| 

While you were busy, I decided to use the time to take care of Hitler here.   
  
**BUCKY:**

| 

Gee, you’re so amazing, Captain America!   
  
**CAP AMERICA:**

| 

Ho ho! Wouldn’t have been able to do it without my shield!   
  
**BUCKY:**

| 

I wish I can grow up to be as strong and brave as you, Captain!   
  
**NARRATOR:**

| 

And after Captain America and his friends tie up the evil Hitler with the rest of his men, Betty rushes into the Captain’s arms.   
  
**BETTY:**

| 

Oh, Captain America! What would I ever do without you?   
  
**CAP AMERICA:**

| 

Betty, dear! I am only ever glad to help! But next time you can lock the door to your infirmary when you know you will be alone. Leaving it open like that, why, you’re just inviting trouble every time!   
  
**BETTY:**

| 

You’re right! I can’t believe I can be so silly sometimes!   
  
**CAP AMERICA:**

| 

My, Betty, you always have me worrying about you! But that is what makes you charming!   
  
**BETTY:**

| 

Oh, Captain, I - what is that?   
  
**FX:**

| 

(Sounds of explosion, gunshots. Screaming, breaking glass. Unidentifiable voices in background: “This way! Hurry!” “Sorry, sorry!” Commotion goes on for about five minutes.)   
  
**MALE VOICE:**

| 

(Far from microphone) Perhaps tossing that gentleman out the window wasn’t the best decision, Miss Carter.   
  
**FEMALE VOICE:**

| 

Would you rather have had him in the path of that bullet?   
  
**MALE VOICE:**

| 

No, suppose not.   
  
**FEMALE VOICE:**

| 

Look at this - Nitramene! I was hoping we would see the last of them after last year. We didn’t even think to look here, but it makes sense. This studio is funded by Roxxon motor oil. Someone working for them must have brought it here, but why? Let’s see what else they got, Jarvis!   
  
**FX:**

| 

(Sounds of footsteps retreating into distance.)  
  
| 

  
  
Editor’s note: it was never confirmed whether this broadcast was intended to air as such or if there was an interruption. To date, this is the shortest episode and the only one to contain no outro. 


End file.
